• mom: did you get home safe?
  • me: no i died a few times

durbikins:

When I die, I want to be buried with sunglasses on and my hands behind my head. So when I deteriorate, I’ll be the chillest skeleton in the graveyard.

(via eyes-likeanocean)
r-aspberrie: ryan and macklemore are freaking sexy as fuck.
what ur average tragedy looks like after 100 years
  • my final thought before making most decisions: fuck it

fl-orida:

potential-and-difference:

prop-215:

dazegetbrighter:

what if rocks are actually soft but just tense up when we touch them?

How stoned are you right now?

Was that a fucking pun?

I believe that was…

(via myeffedupworld)

asphyxion:

i went to a high school where they played jeopardy music when you had about 30 seconds to get to class and i shit you not best part of the day was seeing kids sprinting to class with this music playing

(via screwsociety)

tylenold:

alcohol and calculus dont really mix so thats why i dont drink and derive

(via shenaligans)